Hysteria Lane
 
i am making no promises...if i have something to say i'll post it here...
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
who knew?

I have a box of stuff. In that box are random things that I have been holding onto for years...for every reason and no reason...I found this...


salivating
licking
sucking
nibbling
biting
chewing

mash and grind
mash and grind
mash and grind

between molars

swallow
swallow
swallowed

I ate you,
every morsel.


The title.....ice cream cone! Can you imagine? I was a kid when I wrote that...now as an adult, in my dirty mind, it is soooo not about an ice cream cone...must have been chocolate custard ;-)
posted by averagejane @ 9:03 PM   0 comments
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
snicky snacks


In Celebration of a wonderfully extraordinary woman on her Birthday I am posting a poem I wrote for and about her. We share a love for many things...a good book, the beach, sea shells, booze (:-0) and naps. Her naps took place most afternoons and were lovingly referred to as "going horizontal". My naps are few and far between. I miss my naps.....and my Nana.


Going Horizontal


Vertical! Vertical, I say.
For one day we will all be horizontal.


Finding beauty in simple things,
Dreaming because you can.


Summer is our time,
Sun shine, sun shine.


Laughter, better than medicine.
Better than a Manhattan .


A beacon home,
Your house was mine.


Where else can a sigh
send you reeling,
nostrils flaring,
eyes dripping,
table slapping
Into evening.


Collapsing into cold, soft bed linens.
Hush and roar of oceans wave.


Waking to mouthwatering smells
Of sizzling bacon.
The laughing gulls call.


Two words.
Butter.
Cake.


I will meet you there someday.
We will walk to the point and back
Picking sea shells from the sand.


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posted by averagejane @ 11:34 AM   1 comments
Monday, August 25, 2008
why did you throw your clock out the window?
As the first day of first grade comes to an end I cant help but reminisce about the other firsts that have passed and wonder about the firsts that have yet to come.

We all know ‘time flies when you are having fun‘ but that old adage doesn't apply to the time in my day today. It seems as if I have been sitting here in anticipation for weeks. Awaiting the news of the day from my Baby who is growing too fast. When I took her picture this morning her smile was reminiscent of her first smiles, teeth missing, ear to ear and full of happiness. Just as before, I see nothing but hope and joy and promise and possibility.

Being a parent is incomparable to anything else I have ever done. Each day something is said or done that has never been said or done before and all of these little details that make up one persons life are forgotten. Days aren't remembered, only events. Even some events are devoured by time. With children you are forced to live in the moment but even then the moments hurry past you as if they are being chased. And although I can't wait for 3:15 to come so I can see her glorious face, I will wait, because most days become weeks before you realize.

But I am curious, what would happen if I threw my clock out the window? Would 3:15 come sooner?

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posted by averagejane @ 1:19 PM   0 comments
Saturday, August 23, 2008
"TEAM OBIDEN"

As our politicians are becoming more like movie stars, receiving movie star status and being greeted everyday by the media circus, and less like the future leaders of this nation, I thought it only appropriate that I assign them a combined name ala "Brangelina" or "Bennifer". Drum roll please.....Obama/Biden, is hereto after referred to as “Obiden" just as I am sure you can imagine that McCain and his running mate will be refered to as "Mc" something. "McBloomberg", "McLieberman", "McRomney"...the mcpossiblities are endless....

Instead of detailing my political views and why I am choosing “Obiden“, I will ask you to read, research and make an educated decision when you head for the polls this November.

Some things to think about whilst researching the candidates…

Why do we allow our reporters to use their medium to interject their own biases on us? Is it because they think that we are a nation of fools? That because it is written or on the TV it must be true? Please folks. Wake up and smell your café mocha latte half soy and listen…

YES, it is because they think we are nation of fools! Whether you watch MSNBC or FOXNews I ask that you BACK AWAY FROM THE TV and spend some time learning the facts about the candidates. It is time to vote based solely on the merits of the person running. Time to chose a president that will best represent us based on what YOU think is important…not on what other people are telling you is important. I ask that you whole heartily research the Presidential opponents and vote based on your needs and wants for yourself and this nation.

Information about Barack Obama

THE BLUEPRINT FOR CHANGE

Fight the Smears...Obama's Truth

Information about John McCain

John McCain-Issues

Why McCain

"Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote." --George Jean Nathan (1882-1958)

Most importantly, please VOTE!

REGISTER HERE!



On a personal note:
As a native of Wilmington Delaware I couldn't be more proud. Senator Biden was elected to the senate 2 years before I was born so his name has been part of my consciousness for as long as I can remember. His loyalty to his family, his state and our nation make him a wonderful choice for VP. Senator Biden has served this nation longer than McCain and I assure you Biden won’t forget the number of houses he owns.

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posted by averagejane @ 10:54 AM   0 comments
Friday, August 22, 2008
rug
held together. strong in force.
common goal.
padded
warmth
sadness
sorrow
joy
anger
calm
fear
colors of life in a line.

round they go. tiny threads.
soft and hard.
long and short.

round they go, searching.
searching for the end.

circle of eternity
will die soon
too soon.


i wrote this over 13 years ago. the rug was in the living room of a family who's children i took care of...funny, the things you keep.
posted by averagejane @ 9:55 PM   0 comments
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
plant yourself

In lieu of flowers, I planted myself.

Seriously.

The flower bed out front used to house your average shrub...now it has become a home to me, my neighborhood girl friends and our respective children.

It all began the day we decided to pull said shrubs...they were big and unruly and attracted bugs, my mortal enemy. For weeks the flowerbed out front stayed empty.

Meanwhile, our kids who love to ride bikes and play out front on the large, flat surface of our driveway were having a ball. We moms found ourselves either standing around or sitting on the concrete watching our little "angels" ride all around. (the "angel" above is mine :-)

One day, after days of complaining that we needed seating, I took myself to the 'Supercenter' and purchased what I needed to plant myself. I killed weeds, raked, mulched and arranged the seating just so.

That evening, when the kids begged to go ride bikes, I went with pleasure! And, weather permitted we have all met out front to play and chat in the evenings that followed. The garage freezer is loaded with Popsicles and the fridge with Corona's and lime. Sometimes (read, most times) the 'wine cube' has made it out front as well.

Of all the home improvements I have attempted over the years this one has to be my greatest accomplishment. Even the husbands have gotten in on the action and sit with us. Its a good time...

The moral of my story: Friends are as important as family and community, even if its just the neighborhood, can be a life saver.
So, plant yourself.

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posted by averagejane @ 1:42 PM   1 comments
WASP
You rotten little devil.
How dare you come to my window?
Having the great fortune of wings--have you come to tease me?
Taunt me?
Be gone.
BE GONE.
Or I will propel you into oblivion.

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posted by averagejane @ 10:41 AM   0 comments
let them eat cake

I treated myself today. For a whopping $6.00 I purchased a large slice of decadent white chocolate ganache cake. It was a piece of cake worth waiting for. All afternoon this piece of cake teased me. Every time I opened the refrigerator there he was, the best looking piece ever created. The time was growing near. I fed the children put and them to bed. I poured myself a glass of red wine, grabbed a fork, the cake and off to my bed I went.

It was the perfect setting for self-indulgence. Feather bed, feather pillows and complete silence. As I took the first forkful, my mouth was watering. With great expectation I bit into the driest piece of cake ever made. Cardboard has more moisture in it than this cake! To say I am disappointed would be an understatement! I have had brownies that tasted better than this shit.

As I choked down another dry bite of cake I thanked the gods for delicious wine, feathers and silence.

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posted by averagejane @ 12:16 AM   0 comments
About Me

Name: averagejane
Home: Texas
About Me: In spite of everyones best efforts to make me someone I am not, I became me. I like me.
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